Sibling fights are something that is natural. If they don’t fight, then there’s a problem.
‘Distance makes love grow fonder’ they say. It’s the same with kids, they miss fighting, or rather it’s a source of spending time with each other, which they realize only when they are not together.
In fact, Do you know why children resolve their differences so quickly? It’s the same reason. When kids fight and we think that this is a really big fight and they won’t talk again. We are always wrong. Since fighting is apart of their daily routine, they miss it and hence patch up quickly, getting ready for another fight.
It is this fight, that siblings have in their childhood, that makes them cherish those memories and laugh at it later. Fights make childhood exciting and thus memorable.
In one of the most popular serials by Disney, ‘Kya mast hai life’. There were two characters, Zeeshan and Zenia, who are siblings fighting all the time. But what stayed with me is that, in one of the episodes, it is shown that they are fighting, but when asked by their mother, the reason for their fight, they are unable to remember and instead give reasons for which they had fought a week ago. Amusingly till the end of the episode, they were unable to remember the cause for their fight.
After saying that, fights among siblings are natural, it doesn’t mean that parents are just supposed to watch the show. Understanding the reason for the fight and making the one making mistakes, understand what his mistake was, so as to not repeat it, is very necessary.
Along with that, not favoring one child and assuming that the other one is to be considered wrong because of his previous mistakes, is in itself a very big mistake. This can hurt the child mentally and emotionally and may not feel free to talk to you. Listening is the only key.
Also making kids believe in the value of forgiving is of paramount importance. Holding up to grudges can have worse effects on the overall personality of the child.
Also, if you try and stop kids from fighting, this will create hatred in them for each other, since they are not expressing it. Expressing any emotion gives a kind of relief. So next time, you see your kids fighting, try to listen to them, and don’t break the natural flow.